This is Part 2 in my blog series about bringing animals into your life.
When adopting a pet most of us have an idea of the kind of pet we would like, ideally a well-behaved and well-adjusted animal companion that loves us unconditionally, one that is able to adapt to whatever lifestyle we have. Certainly this outcome is possible, yet it takes time, especially with animals who have been abandoned and traumatized. While viewed as an admirable choice, adopting a rescue animal can also be a challenging one as more time is required to develop a bond and fully enjoy one another.
From the animal’s perspective, the process of being given up combined with the uncertainty of what will happen next is highly stressful. Some animals have been in situations where they knew they might be euthanized. Some have spent time moving between different foster families before they found forever homes. Regardless of whether you adopt your pet through a shelter or rescue organization, you can expect a period of adjustment. While there is no clear answer as to how long it may take for your newly adopted rescue pets to adapt to their new homes, a period of at least six months to a year is not uncommon and sometimes an animal needs up to two years to fully adjust.
In sessions I’ve had with rescue animals, a common thread is the experience of grief about the loss of familiar people and animals they knew. There is often confusion about why they were given up, and shame that they were not lovable. If they were abused before being rescued, they may have symptoms of PTSD, which often presents as increased anxiety, aggression or withdrawing. They may also have anxiety that the same thing will happen again. Because they don’t have words to articulate their experiences they can only act out this process in some way.
Fortunately, animals are both resilient and forgiving! I have seen many positive changes in rescue animals when they have felt heard and understood by their human families. At the same time, some animals’ wounds may always be acted out in some way due to the traumatic imprinting of their nervous systems. As an example, even if your pet “knows” you are going to return at the end of a work day, they may still exhibit anxiety that they cannot control. Some animals may need medication, bodywork, more structured routines, etc. to support their needs, depending on their personalities and past history. There are experiences too where it becomes clear that a newly adopted rescue is not a good fit with a given family. Recognizing this is an important step and helping the animals with their transition back to the rescue organization or the shelter can be a difficult but caring act.
In summary, if you have recently adopted a rescue pet or are considering adopting one, here are a few things to keep in mind:
Rescue animals need ample time and space to adapt to their new homes. Most of them come into our homes with “baggage.”
Keep in mind how PTSD and shame from any previous neglect or abuse may be impacting their behavior. If your cat is hiding under the bed, or your dog is growling when startled, it is likely a stress response and not a personal response to you or your home.
As humans, we have the capacity to articulate our experiences and thus make sense of them. We can share this ability with our adopted rescue pets. We can literally talk to them, letting them know that we are aware of their need to grieve, adjust and adapt to their new environments, that it’s not easy and we care about them.
Take things a day at a time. You and your rescue pet are on a learning curve, each finding out what the other needs. Give yourself and your pet ample doses of time, patience and reassurance.
Call on the resources you need from family, friends and professionals, let yourself be supported and open to learning. You don’t need to (and won’t!) do things perfectly. Remember, animals are resilient and forgiving!
See part 3 in my blog series. Who is Adopting Whom? --- Bringing an animal home: Pets with special needs.